Pip to his friend at school: I cut down a huge tree in the backyard on the weekend. When I was doing it I hacksawed my leg.
Pip’s friend: Seriously? Did you cut your leg off?
Pip to his friend: No dude, I still have two legs.
Pip’s friend: Did you have to get stitches?
Pip to his friend: No…
but I did have to get a really big band-aid.