I was interested to read Stomper’s recent post about real parents.
I am a pretty free and flowing parent. I don’t even think that I parent any more. My children are 16 and 12 and they never make a decision that disappoints me. Please don’t assume that my children are perfect…lots of hard work was done when they were younger. Now they are just cruisy, easy-going, well-mannered young people.
I have always been a big believer that personality is innate. You are born with a personality. Your environment can influence you, but essentially you react to it in the way that your personality programs you. I have not fought against my children’s personalities. They are very different human beings and I have allowed them the space they needed to be themselves (in a socially acceptable way!)
My children talk to me fairly easily. Our family is very open about our lives and no topic is taboo in our family. We are not easily offended by topic or language. I like that. I am very grateful to have this relationship with my children.
This week my daughter came to me to discuss a car accident that was reported in our city. An 18yo driver had lost control of a vehicle and killed his 16yo passenger. This is a media focus around Australia at the moment and is quite close to home for us. I reminded her that she always had a choice about getting into a car. She only had to call on us or one of my sisters and we would pick her up any where, any time if she was uncomfortable.
“Never get into a car with someone you think is a dickhead!” I said to her.
She gave me a knowing smile and nod and with big, innocent eyes said, “Hmm. Last time I travel with you then.”
Fancy ME having a smart-mouthed child!